What do you hear when you listen to your thoughts? Is it empowering you, motivating you, or making you feel down?
Thoughts, whether they are positive or negative, are very powerful so they need to be chosen carefully. You would not constantly tell someone you love “You are so stupid!” or “You sound ridiculous”, or “You look ugly”. Yet, sometimes, from the moment you are awake until you go to sleep at night, you feed your own mind with negative thoughts or limiting beliefs like “I could never do that” or “I’m not good enough to have that”. You listen to this internal self-talk all day long and because persistence creates results, you achieve what you told yourself: you feel powerless and act accordingly.
I love this quote from Laird Hamilton: “Make sure your worse enemy doesn’t live between your own two ears.” This is so true, we are our worse critic and unless we change our mindset, we cannot escape. At least when someone else criticises you, you can leave the room or simply decide not to listen anymore.
So how do you change your mindset and stop the seed of negativity being planted in your mind by others? Try these 3 simple tips for a start:
- First you need to watch the company you are keeping. Some people specialise in putting you down and if you choose to accept their comments, you are given them full power. Remember it is only their opinion as you are the only one who really knows yourself; plus it says more about who they are and their insecurities than about you.
- Whenever you have negative thoughts in your mind, replace them with more positive and empowering ones. For example, if you are telling yourself “I can’t do that, it is too difficult and I don’t know how”; replace these words with “It is not easy and I can’t do it yet. I’m going to learn or ask someone and then with a little practice…” You will soon get into the habit of it and it will literally change your life.
- Have you noticed that when negative things happen to you in the morning and you tell yourself “Great, now I’m going to have a bad day”, then this is just what happens! How about treating the event with the insignificance it probably deserves, acknowledging it, and then making a conscious decision that things from now on will be fine. Project what you actually want to happen and notice the difference in your day... Another helpful way to have better days is to be grateful. So when you go to bed at night, find at least 3 things you are grateful for in your life. I challenge you not to find anything. To start with and while your mind gets used to having more positive thoughts, choose simple ones like “I’m grateful that I had a healthy dinner tonight”, or I’m grateful that I met my friend and she cheered me up”, or “I’m grateful that I managed to replace most of my negative thoughts by positive ones”. You will be surprised how quickly you find more things to be grateful about as whatever you think of the most, you get more of.
So have a go. Try these simple tips for yourself and let me know how you get on.
There are numerous other simple techniques you can use to shift your mindset and help you live a happier and more fulfilling life. If you need some personal help, please get in touch .
I look forward to reading your thoughts and comments, and in the meantime I wish you all the best.